Hopeless romantic vs. Love cynic

I am a bit bipolar when it comes to thinking about love and relationships, unsure of what I really think about it all and what my love future looks like. I feel differently on different days so here are the two sides of my heart. Maybe I can decide which side I’m really on.

Hopeles romantic

On one hand, I am a hopeless romantic. I love romantic films, stories of happily ever afters and dream that Mr Darcy is real and will sweep me off my feet any day now. I like the idea of soul mates and really want someone to love me just the way I am and for it to last forever.

Love cynic

On the other hand, my rose tinted glasses are sometimes foggy. I have been single for a while now so I’m pretty independent and that wedding day fantasy seems to be pretty far away. I have had bad experiences, I’ve been burned and I hear a lot about relationship dramas that I have no desire to get sunk into. I’m pretty cynical about finding a soul mate, most men seem to be useless at being “the one” and I rarely see anyone that I think might be a possibility for me.

Taylor Swift’s take on this problem…

When I was a little girl I used to read fairy tales. In fairy tales you meet Prince Charming and he’s everything you ever wanted. In fairy tales the bad guy is very easy to spot. The bad guy is always wearing a black cape so you always know who he is. Then you grow up and you realize that Prince Charming is not as easy to find as you thought. You realize the bad guy is not wearing a black cape and he’s not easy to spot; he’s really funny, and he makes you laugh, and he has perfect hair.”
โ€” Taylor Swift

The verdict

I suppose I’ll always wish for my own happy ending but if it doesn’t happen I’ll be okay on my own. And hopefully I’ll be able to spot my Prince if he ever appears and avoid the bad guys if he doesn’t. Because whether I get my romance or now, I know I don’t want to settle for second best, I want my soul mate whether he does or doesn’t really exist.

Are you a hopeless romantic or love cynic? Or like me, a bit of both?




29 thoughts on “Hopeless romantic vs. Love cynic”

  1. i’ve never been in a relationship so can’t really comment. I now no longer watch romantic movies or try to not to listen to love songs as it makes me feel real jealous. I no longer dream of getting married ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

    The only love song I can bear to listen to is “take my breath away” by Berlin, as all I think about is that breakfast cereal advert featuring Rob Brydon whenever it comes onto my iPod. I must be a crunchy nutter! :p


    p.s. here’s the advert –

  2. I’ve never been in what most would deem a “serious relationship” however, I am cautiously optimistic. Don’t be hard on yourself for not always being able to spot the bad guy… he is sneaky (hence the reason he is a bad guy!!) However, it is important to put yourself out there and not deny others the chance to realize what an amazing woman you are! It is important not to settle, however remember that some things aren’t always the deal breakers you think they are. Everyone tells me that “it happens when you least expect it”, so just remember to keep you eyes, ears, and heart open to what the universe sends your way.

  3. I have to admit, I’m a little bit of both like you. I’ve always thought about the whole “soul mate” thing and had fantasies of running off somewhere with my “true love” and all that jazz. I think almost every girl has had that fantasy at some point. But I’ve been in a couple of serious relationships and they didn’t seem to be that awesome to me; to put it really bluntly. But I still think that there’s someone out there for everyone, it’s just a matter of finding them :]

  4. im a massive cynic. Im the one in the house that shouts “vom” if anything comes across as too nice. Im terrible, but when you have been burned you know to be more cautious on hovering your hand over the flame, right? i still do it though x

  5. I’m a bit of both. Having been in a couple long term relationships, I can also testify that the happily ever after part isn’t exactly right or easy either. That “honeymoon” stage flies by fast, and after that it’s up to you to decide if it’s something you want to work at with this person or move on. Right now I’m working on it. But I’m also working on me, I want to be sure I’m always growing and learning about myself too.

  6. HA!!! I love Taylor’s outlook. It’s sooooo true. I just happened to have found my prince (married 15 years now) but it wasn’t easy. I’d have to say I’m the hopeless romantic. I was, long ago, a true cynic. Parents divorced, I was cheated on, and so on. Never thought I’d find love. Didn’t want to, it hurt too much, but that changed when I met my prince.

    It just took a long time. LOL!

  7. I’m definitely a bit of both, though in the past the ‘bad guys’ are what led up to the cynical part. Your soulmate is out there. I can all but guarantee he’ll turn up when you’re not even looking for him – that’s how it usually happens. ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. As soon as I swore off guys . . . my BFF appeared.

    I kept him at a distance for months, using the “let’s just be friends” approach to “dating.” He grew on me. Yadda Yadda Yadda.

    We’ve been together for 31 years now ~ and married for 27. Happiness is being married to your best friend.

    I hope you find your best friend forever, Vix

  9. I’ve pretty much sworn off men. I’m beginning to think my standards are too strict, and besides, I’m used to being independent.

    But there are times that I get into that hopeless romantic state and really wish I had a relationship… then the cynic in me starts talking!

  10. Oh wow ! This really struck a chord with me. I feel that I am a cynic and a hopeless romantic wrapped into one such as yourself. Glad I am not the only one. I am twenty years old, I hate the idea of marriage, having kids and the โ€œAmerican dreamโ€ Iโ€™m quite eccentric and I like taking the path less traveled. I feel as though having a relationship takes away from this and makes it hard for me to ever truly be myself. Iโ€™m also fiercely independent. I have seen too many relationships fail due to lying, cheating and simply being with the wrong one. Iโ€™ve constantly been surrounded by needy and dependent type of people that need a relationship, no matter who it is with. So I gotta say hell no to any of the !

    But on the other hand that hopeless romantic side of me is deep inside of me. Probably a secret longing of my heart. I would love to have a true soulmate that fit me perfectlyโ€ฆ..

    But thatโ€ฆ. seems like it will only ever be a secret dream of mine. To the world Iโ€™m the morbid cynic lol.

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